Getting sensible about things around

The Melbourne day gets longer and lighter. A few months ago, when I first started my 7.30am shift, the sky was completely dark at the time I left. The bleak winds blended with frosty air, chilled you from head to toe, from inside out. Spring is not too far ahead. I am looking forward to seeing things having a new start.

I have been anxiously waiting for this Saturday to come, the day I will move into this Flinders St apartment. A brand new metropolitan life style for me. Living right in the city centre would greatly improve my social outgoing opportunities, and the most important is I don’t need to suffer the pain from not seeing my lover.

How embarrassed is that! Every time I watch a detective movie, I fall asleep when they were about to reveal the murder. Last night was even worse, I did not even realise the CSI episode was finished when I woke up from a half sleep state. I insisted saying to Z, “No, it is CSI, isn’t it? See, the same female corpse is lying on the operating table!” Then I sulkily found out it was another detective show. I fell into another sleep shortly, without even knowing Z’s leaving.

I had been unsuccessful for pitching a project with a small consulting company. I was not surprise by the time I received the decline letter, as I knew that I did badly in the group interview. On Saturday, after the early morning interview, I was extremely upset as I knew I had loads to learn before I could compete in the real world. I am smart but I would not call myself intelligent, worse with my bad health, I do have a lot to learn if I want to leave what I am currently doing. Honestly, I would be happier and living comfortably if I am content with what I am having. But what a waste of life!