Going back again

The past one year is like a dream. I can’t believe one year has already flied away and I am back to the starting point – not quite. Accidentally, I stepped into an industry that I was passionate about and spent time learning from the best talents in Southeast Asia. I have done some traveling in the region and unexpectedly started a relationship that has been long-halted. Astonishing, in October, I started flying back and forth between Singapore and China as my beloved father is found to have a terminal illness. Shortly after Chinese New Year, I have given up my satisfying job and stable life in Singapore and moved back to spend some time with my parents, with whom I feel so remote after seven years of parting. Now, I am waiting to fly back to this continent in the Pacific Ocean. Will I hate it as much as I did a year ago? I don't know. One thing I am sure is I want to do something better this time round.

My parents saw me off at the airport. I tried not to wave them good-bye at the departure gate as I know none of us could withhold our tears. For the whole two months I was with them, they still treated me as the little girl who was clumsy and not capable of taking care of herself. I am stubborn, so is my mum; that creates arguments between us almost every second day. I got frustrated, furious, and upset, yet I was still trying to mend the relationship. It is not something that I can cut off casually, it is a blood-tie that holds a family together.

Being the only and youngest child gives me a lot of privilege, including loves from the whole family. Like many others, while I am at home I complain, while I am away I yearn the comfort they provide. Human is like that, you only treasure the things that you don't have.

I really wish I will see my father again … not in a hospital setting.